Got to stand up for myself, you know?“Some how I ended up in a bathroom with Michael’s dick in my mouth. I still don’t know exactly how it happened. I wasn’t drugged, I wasn’t too drunk to know what I was doing, it was just like I was outside myself, you know? I look back and I can’t for the life of me see what I was thinking, what I was feeling. It was just there, the flirting got more serious and some how, there I was. I still really have no idea why.”Gina and Rhonda exchanged a glance, while Mae kept her attention on Brooklyn. It was a familiar story.“And it was ... well, it was good. You know? Exciting. Mysterious. Wrong. Naughty. I don’t know. It was just ... fun. I was outside myself, almost. Doing things I knew I shouldn’t be.“Anyway, we did it. I couldn’t help myself, it was like THE most important thing right then, to get that dick in my mouth and shower lust on it. He came in my mouth. I didn’t swallow, and spit it out into the toilet. Suddenly it was the WORST thing I. "Was this Charles without his mask? Was this who he was? Some creepy guylooking through the keyhole? Drooling while his wife fucks someone else?It seemed cheap. It seem sleazy. I wanted to shower just from talkingabout it."Charles, we don't have to screw around to love each other," I said. "Myvagina is yours. Do you really want to watch another man undress me,touch me, fuck me?" No....yes," he said. "I think it would be so hot. I've called up thewebsites, Junie. I've read the stories. Listen, I wouldn't have to sleepwith anyone else. I just want you to try it/ I trust you. It doesn'thave to affect what we are."Me? An adultress? A cheater? I couldn't do that. Could I?It wasn't lost on me that he was offering me hedonistic pleasure.Another man -- other men, even -- to satisfy this masochistic streak. Andwhat happens afterward? Does he take me home? Do we sleep in the samebed? Do I fall in love with the other guy? Did I want to think ofCharles as not being man enough to handle his wife?.
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